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Saturday, 7 April 2012

The Three Things In Life

I remember sitting on the plane earlier this year having a quality conversation with someone about three things in life and I want to share this list;

Three things in life that never change in time ~ Integrity, Truth, Loyalty
Three things in life that never fail ~ True love, Self confidence, Friendship
Three things in life that once gone, will never come back ~ Time, Words, Opportunity

Three things in life that once lost, hard to build-up ~ Respect, Trust, Relationship
Three things in life that are never certain ~ Dream, Success, Fortune 
Three things in life that may never be lost ~ Peace, Hope, Honesty
Three things in life that make a person ~ Hardwork, Sincerity, Commitment
Three things in life that can destroy a person ~ Alcohol/ Drugs, Pride, Anger

Three things in life that are most appreciated - Generosity, Humor, Forgiveness
Three things in life that are truly constant ~ Father, Son, Holy Ghost

I woke up early Easter morning and sat down watching Dhyan Vimal talked about" Exercising Your Right to Grow". What caught my attention was his phrase "I must become strong enough that I allow myself to be met and I must find somebody who is capable of meeting me and allowing me to meet them."

We all know relationship can be delicate, subtle and complicated. Normally people with good relationship swill never need to talk about it, only the bad relationships are constantly mentioned. That is why we all recognised how important relationship is. Until today, I asked myself how did I fall in love in my previous relationships, I have no answers. I hope I never know, I just pray I don't mess up the next relationship.  

Every time someone fall in love, they will feel vulnerable. Why? Because there is the possibility of rejection and disappointment. The art of any relationship is to be able to find strength in that vulnerability, only then the chances to mess up is slim because we can't find security in any relationship anyway. Trust me there is no security in this world that can make you feel 100% safe. Safety is when you start trusting love. You can marry a smart scientist and sign the papers written by the greatest lawyer but still not have a perfect marriage.

Q1: What makes love so beautiful? 
Because it is not secure, if life is secure, it is boring. We recognise we are alive because there is death, so do we start trusting because there is love? Humans need to be loved, in order to stay healthy. The way I approach loving someone, is simple, no matter what happens, even if he is gone, we had once enriched each other and I am going to be okay because I trust love. To trust, we first need to recognise love. By knowing how we have been loved, it becomes the compass to guide us to find the person who we will love or love us back more. (Watching the series 2 Broke Girls gave me an insight)

Q2: What is defines a relationship?
According to Dhyan, relationship is when two begin to act as one. Falling in love is the promise of becoming one, being in love is the process of becoming one and when you attain to love, you are one.

Relationship is unique in many different ways. We are born to meet one and another. This is why I love travelling around the world. I want to look around new places, eat good food, understand new cultures but most importantly I desperately want to meet as many people as I can DEEPLY. I focus on enjoying the time and company of others during my brief holidays.

Q3: We need more mature relationship?
We are adults, we should be able to make decisions and act on our own.
Why do men have to be superior and tell a women what they should be doing? Are men suppose to play the role of father in the relationship?
Why do women continuously nag the men? Women must surely understand that they can still love without being the mother in the relationship.
If the woman becomes successfull the man gets threaten, when the man gains power the woman gets insecure. (How amazing the series Desperate Housewives had this issue covered so differently in every household) 

The society thinking has to change now but how? Well if we are all solid and independent individual, together we can bring our ability to the table. Won't you would want to be with someone who do not make you worry all the time? As if we don't have enough troubles at work, no one wants to come home at the end of the day to more problems. Treat each other as "mature" adults and "respect" their needs, be "honest" to yourself. Jealousy is a deep seated fear and can destroy any relationship even the strong ones. It comes down to the skill of living with one another, to be friendly even to strangers and to start trusting wisely.

"If you are secure yourself, you automatically will attract the person who is secure in them."


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