I am at home looking out the window at a beautiful weather, sitting here alone I start pondering what triggered me to cry in front of someone so suddenly in public. (This does not usually happen to me but after a few drinks especially when I am hungry or tired the alcohol kicks in pretty fast, tears start rolling down my cheeks, friends who come over to me and asked what’s wrong can make it worst)
Back in college, A was overly protective and jealous that I felt trap and wanted to run away. I trusted B and supported him all through university, but I was disappointed and betrayed over and over again. So we parted ways. Now C was so annoying that I had never felt that I can actually be so repulsive of someone. Have you ever meet a guy who does not take no for an answer? I tell you, he drove me up the wall, I was so frustrated. Finally I met D I must say out of all the guys I met, he has my respect ... great attitude, kind and cheerful. Somewhere along those lines, but he lost his direction and left me hanging. I was abandon and alone again.
Feeling trap, betray, disgust and lost, I told myself it can’t get any worse … to those who liked me before, I am sorry if I have treated you poorly, please forgive me for rejecting your good intentions.
How long can I hang on before I pull myself up, how close can I get and not fall over?
How far can I reach? How fast can I run away?
Love is patient, love is kind, it does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud, it does not dishonour others, it is not self seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs, it does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth, it always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres and love never fails. Corinthians 13: 4-8
Simple but difficult to practise, well nobody said life would be easy, they just promised it would be worth it.